cheryl brace 1|1|Cheryl, are you trying to tell us something!?!? Email me if you want to talk!|saint6811|waylan@comcast.net|07:34:03|11/06/2009|
A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have.
--Thomas Jefferson--
You cannot build character and courage by taking away people's initiative and independence.
You cannot help people permanently by doing for them, what they could and should do for themselves.
~Abraham Lincoln
2|1|I would do.....|maraj|maraj64@hotmail.com|07:42:30|11/06/2009|
Everything, or at least as much as, I'd always wanted to do but didn't because I was either too afraid to, didn't think I should, etc. I'd try to make amends w/those dear to me & spend as much quality time w/my loved ones as possible. I would plan for my departure but I'd live for each moment & take advantage of every day, relishing in the sunshine, the fresh air, time w/my friends & the beauty of nature. I would make every day a party, celebrating life, laughing & dancing to my heart's content & singing at the top of my lungs (now this might alienate a few! LOL). And I would eat as much junk food as I wanted. :)
But, I wouldn't tell anyone that my time was drawing near until it was closing in cuz I wouldn't want a pity party or people to be nice to me just because they thought I was going to be checking out.
ETA: This is for me ONLY, my own PERSONAL perspective. It was NOT meant to insinuate what anyone else should/shouldn't do, merely what *I*/MYSELF would likely do if I was told I was on borrowed time. I simply want happiness & not so much sadness while I'm still here as there will likely be enough sadness when I'm gone. My sincerest apologies for any insensitivity or confusion. :)
We live in the Land of the Free only because of the Brave!
Please identify yourself in 1st email w/name/username. Due to recent problem trades, if I haven't traded w/you before, I will probably require you send your end 1st or I'll need LEGIT trade references/feedback. I will be happy to provide the same. IF you plan to hold your end til you've received mine, I will need to know that IMMEDIATELY, BEFORE trade is finalized.
3|1|had major heartattaack.|suzyq70|cdbrace3@aol.com|07:44:29|11/06/2009|
>Posted on Nov-06-09 at 07:20 AM (Eastern)
>by 205.188.116.68cheryl brace
cheryl brace my spinal cord surgery was delayed for 6 to 8months.time is attiking. on lots of meds
7|2|((((Cheryl))))|sunriver|lithiasalt@cheerful.com|10:27:13|11/06/2009|
As hard as it would be for me to face death, I want to think that I personally would sort of feel a little grateful (for lack of a better word) if I was able to know that I was in my last year or whatever time frame it was, because at least it would give me a little opportunity to say goodbye to my family and my kids. I would try to travel if I could. I would spend most of my time with the people I love the most and like Joy I would also probably try to look ahead and see if there was anything I could do to help make that transition for them any easier. One thing I would probably do is write letters and put them away for specific times after I am gone (one to be read at each daughters wedding for example, one for graduations, maybe even birthday letters... stuff like that) and some love notes for DH to find as he would be trying to move forward as well.
I'm certain I would cry a lot, and laugh just as much as I remembered some of the funny things we have all done together. I would write my own obit and I have already made some funeral plans, but if I had not done that yet I would make sure I had that all squared away so that there would be less of those details for my family to deal with while they are at their worst.
I would call/write/e-mail every person in my past who I had something to say to (assuming I could find their contact info through zabasearch/google).
That is some of what I would do.
I am so sorry you are going through that. You have a lot of friends here, so please let us know if we can help.
Vanessa
4|1|no joke..this is for real|suzyq70|cdbrace3@aol.com|07:47:39|11/06/2009|
>Posted on Nov-06-09 at 07:20 AM (Eastern)
>by 205.188.116.68cheryl brace
cheryl brace
5|2|Cheryl, I am a practical person, so I wouldnt be skydiving or bunging jumping....I'd be getting my affairs in order, planning for my family's future...and then I'd spend every second I could just being with them, maybe telling my kids about their childhood more, writing a journal maybe so they have their history as I know it....I'd sit and hold my husband's hand, take drives and look at nature's wonders....console family and friends who are afraid of what's to come. That's not my advice to you, it's what I would do....we are all different, so we all have to do what's right for us. Please email me to talk anytime....you have been in my prayers, and I'll be praying for you still.|saint6811|waylan@comcast.net|07:56:12|11/06/2009|
A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have.
--Thomas Jefferson--
You cannot build character and courage by taking away people's initiative and independence.
You cannot help people permanently by doing for them, what they could and should do for themselves.
~Abraham Lincoln
6|1|cye|greenthumbs|greenthumbs@charter.net|08:58:55|11/06/2009|
You have a good day. 8|2|So here is my thought on this|petunia1|sweetpea39@comcast.net|10:32:37|11/06/2009|
(First of all - prayers to you Cheryl, sorry you are still hurting so much. praying for relief)
If you would do all this if you KNEW you only had a limited amount of time, why would you not do this NOW....we really do not kow when our time will be up so we should treasure our time with family and friends. let go of the little things that keep families apart (and friends) do not hold grudges, Wake up each day with a Smile on your face (altough some days are harder than others) and say "today is going to be a good day"
Try to do at least 1 nice thing for soemone everyday, even if it is something small. you never know what that card really meant, the candy bar, helping complete a task, one little phone call.........Does not have to cost alot or anything just a moment of your time......
Hugs Cheryl ~ Do not be afraid. God will take care of you ~ 9|3|For me I would do these things.|HONEY11|HONEY1@AMERITECH.NET|16:49:40|11/06/2009|
Get my will made out, funeral plans, my obituary written. Then I would make sure to give my prized possessions away to the people I wanted to have them ahead of time.(photo's, items etc) I would downsize my house and get rid of all the clutter, and just live a more simpler life(less stuff for my family to have to move & deal with later). Leave video tapes to my family/friends of "my life" sharing moments on tape of me growing up and how much each person meant to me and a funny moment, or just anything special we shared together..
I would take a trip somewhere I always wanted to go and video tape it. Enjoy all the sunsets & sunrises I could possibly take in, make the most of each day, spend lots of time with family and friends...enjoy living. Like another person posted, I would not tell anyone I was passing...I would hold off, I don't want what time I had left people feeling sorry for me, or feeling sad...I would want to embrace life, smile and stay in the moment as long as I can.
For my son I think I'd write a journal for him that he can read anytime he is feeling sad. I would also find someone to to do this for me and give them things to "hold" (like letters and presents)I would want them to to mail a letter to my son every month after I am gone...for the first year at least..I would include celebrating his b-day with a card & cake and present from mom, and a x-mas present come the holidays. I want him to know that I will always be there in spirit looking out over him and how much he is loved.
I would do something special for my bf too, don't know what, but he would know that he was loved as well, and how much joy he brought to my life.
I would want to leave this world with no regrets, and no grudges or bad feelings about anyone or anything...to make a peaceful transition.
10|1|My dad went thru this......|maraj|maraj64@hotmail.com|17:49:43|11/06/2009|
My dad had COPD & Congestive Heart Failure. He fought VERY hard to live, to make the most of the time he had left & of course, got his affairs in order. I spent as much time w/him as I could, every day making sure he got to do whatever it was he wanted to do that day, always planning for the next. What bothered him & what bothered me was the pitiful looks & "oh, poor you" & "you shouldn't do that", etc. He was told he shouldn't even have/attend his & my mom's 50th anniversary celebration, a very special milestone for BOTH my parents. Then because he did want to have the celebration & did attend, it took alot out of him so he suffered a few days after. And instead of compassion & understanding, he got chewed out & was basically told "tough sh*t" by the hospice nurses he had at the time, & he was told to cut a timed release pain med in half by the on-call dr. :( And because he was prone to frequent fluid build-up & pneumonia, there were many hospitalizations & we ALL spent those times on pins & needles wondering, "is this it", "is he going to pull thru this time"? It was a very emotional roller coaster ride for him & everyone else. I vowed then that I did NOT want any of that for myself or for those close to me. My dad was dying yes, but he wanted to LIVE while he still could, & he didn't want people crying everytime they visited w/him; he wanted people to be happy (he loved to joke around), continue living themselves & to help him make the most of the time he had left, not spend it being so sorrowful or walking on eggshells. He didn't want to talk about death & dying cuz he knew it was coming, he'd made preparations, so he didn't want to be reminded of it every day, wanting instead to focus more on the here & now. That's what I want. ;)
We live in the Land of the Free only because of the Brave!
Please identify yourself in 1st email w/name/username. Due to recent problem trades, if I haven't traded w/you before, I will probably require you send your end 1st or I'll need LEGIT trade references/feedback. I will be happy to provide the same. IF you plan to hold your end til you've received mine, I will need to know that IMMEDIATELY, BEFORE trade is finalized.
11|1|Cheryl, nothing is set in stone. They may say you have a year and a half, but you may have longer than that. I guess, it is kind of like Tim McGraw's song...Live each day like you are dying, because we all never know if today is going to be our last day.|Ranalt|ainebailey@gmail.com|20:24:05|11/06/2009|
My MIL has been "dying" for the past thirty years. She has had last rites administered nine times. She has almost been declared dead three times.
Every six months or so we get a new prognosis of death. Two years ago we were told she wasn't going to make it six weeks. She is still here today.
Hospice has been called more times than I can count, and they end up leaving.
For all of my MIL medical issues, she shouldn't be alive, but by the grace of god she is.
She no longer will let her doctor's tell her "how much time she has left" when they feel like giving her a prognosis.
So, Cheryl, live each day to the fullest and know that you are in my prayers and many other board members prayers as well.
Take care,
Life is like a cup of tea,
It's all in how you make it.
Lisa
12|2|Very well said Lisa and I agree :) Cheryl I will be praying for you but there is no death date stamped on you, only the good LORD knows when it's your time to be with him (((HUGS)))~*~|RebekkaVA|queen_vulture@msn.com|20:39:48|11/06/2009|
~*~REBEKKA~*~
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Married to my Soul Mate William
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