I would rather have a mind opened by wonder than one closed by belief.
3|1|Perhaps you should explain you told said person $18 shippin at the beginning which she paid.. then mailed despite the fact it was then $70 and then expected her to pay the difference|Kristy|mi3zons1@yahoo.com|14:26:25|02/11/2009|
"Women should not have children after 35. Thirty-five children are enough." - anonymous (Only 28 to GO!) 4|1|Yup if you made a deal for x amount for postage and it cost you more you eat it |teener|teenerzacsneenee@yahoo.com|14:31:14|02/11/2009|
>Last edited on Feb-11-09 at 02:15 PM
>(Eastern) by 12.226.246.159Posted on Feb-11-09 at
>02:10 PM (Eastern) by 12.226.246.159
>i was doing a trade on the
>board and had tons of items
>that were being shipped in two
>different boxes. they were too heavy
>for me to pick up as
>i am 8 months pregnant. i
>ended up taking them to ups,
>as the post office wouldnt take
>them for being too big. each
>box ended up weighing in at
>over 50lbs. i went ahead and
>sent them and figured i would
>just let the gal know, she
>could ante up the shipping and
>we would be even. shipping ended
>up costing $70. she was totally
>upset that i went ahead and
>sent them. i apologized and told
>her, i thought she would end
>up wanting them anyways and if
>she didnt, she could just refuse
>the shipment or leave a note
>saying the same and be done
>and over with it. i asked
>her if she would be willing
>to help out with shipping cost
>and she claims absolutely not! i
>told her i would pay for
>half and send the rest of
>her money back. i thought i
>was doing a good thing for
>going ahead and sending them to
>her and figuring that we could
>make amends about the rest of
>it. i havent heard from her
>yet but the packages were delivered
>today and not refused. it was
>$80 for the items that she
>bought from me and $70 to
>ship them. i got $100 from
>her. im not quite sure what
>to do if she decides not
>to send the items back to
>me and not send me back
>the rest of the money. she
>claims it was all my fault
>as literally i shouldnt have been
>stupid enough to think anyone would
>pay that much for shipping and
>that i shouldve never sent them
>in the first place. i am
>even willing to help fray some
>of the cost and she will
>get most of her money back.
>what do you think and am
>i in the wrong or what
>should i do?
5|1|AND she told the person she was trading she would only send back half of their money NOT full like she stated in the OP|Kristy|mi3zons1@yahoo.com|14:31:18|02/11/2009|
"Women should not have children after 35. Thirty-five children are enough." - anonymous (Only 28 to GO!) 24|2|i have since sent her a different email|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:02:20|02/11/2009|
realizing that i should have never sent them to her and told her that i would refund all of the money as that was only right and then maybe i could try and recoup some of the cost for these. i just didnt know what else to do in this situation. but as long as she doesnt open them, she doesnt have to pay to ship them back to me 6|1|yup, you should eat the extra cost (or shouldn't have sent it)|Beaglesfly|lmllr77@aol.com|14:45:46|02/11/2009|
I would have been furious too if you had not given me the option to forego the trade. You're not talking about an extra dollar or two.....maybe the extra $50 would have made it not worth her while.
lauren 7|2|i was trying to see if there was something we could work out since i had already shipped items|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|15:02:29|02/11/2009|
i asked her if half would be okay and then sent her numerous other emails that said i would eat shipping but would like the items back since she wasnt willing to pay for the shipping. she said she wished i wouldve never shipped them and i told her i thought i was doing the right thing by sending them to her. when she told me that she wished i wouldve waited, i explained to her i had no way to get them back to my vehicle as i am pregnant and dont know how i wouldve done this. i got boyfriend to load them into my van for me but i had to do the rest. i let her know that she could either refuse the items or she could leave a note saying she refused these two boxes and then once i saw they were on their way back, i would get her the money. i havent heard from her again regarding these and it makes me sick to think that i ended up paying for all this and told her that she could refuse these and that im not even going to get a response from her about them. i told her i would send all the money but what she originally paid for shipping and didnt expect to not hear from her again. i told her in the email i send her yesterday that i hope she did the right thing and sent them back to me. now i see she has been talking to other people about this but wont respond back to me in personal emails. i was just trying to be nice and had told her from the beginning that shipping was probably going to be more and that i would let her know what it was after shipping it and then we could get even then. she didnt balk about it then, until she found out what shipping cost would actually be. like i told her, i was sorry and that by her refusing the shipment and me waiting until friday to get her money back was all i could do. looks like i got screwed big time on this one! 8|3|the original amount for postage|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|15:07:43|02/11/2009|
only consisted of the first items that were being sent. once the other 40 boxes got added on was when it made it so much. like i said before, i told her i was truly sorry and that she could sent it back to me and i would refund all but the original shipping cost. now she wont even return my emails, so what now? i figured she would refuse them as i wouldnt ever make a deal and then not pay for it and then still keep the items. i wouldve refused it, if it wouldve been the other way around and waited for my money to come back. i wouldnt have accepted the packages at all. thats just me. i wouldnt have bit off that other persons head either or put that person down for doing a nice thing. like i said, i never imagined that it would cost that much and if i wouldve thought that she wouldnt have done it, i wouldve never sent them anyways. im just trying to get my money back, so that i dont have a total loss in the end but keep her happy. im only one person and i can only do so much. 10|4|How would you have felt if it was the other way around? You knew the postage before you paid for it |teener|teenerzacsneenee@yahoo.com|15:12:23|02/11/2009|
if you thought that was to high and that you yourself would not want to pay that much than you should not have sent jmo 9|3|You made the deal for $20 to be the shipping correct ? Than once you shipped the deal was complete as per the agreement It's done and over |teener|teenerzacsneenee@yahoo.com|15:09:45|02/11/2009|
she doesn'y have to respond to you Sorry but being pregnant isn't an excuse and if it is a problem than you should hold off from trading till after the baby comes jmo 11|4|not really|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|15:16:32|02/11/2009|
i tried to correspond to her and let her know that i was sorry and she wont email me back. i was trying to do the right thing and didnt think these actually weighed 100lbs. i told her that if she sent them back i would give her all the money back and that is all i truly want. i havent been able to do anything since i found out that she wouldnt have wanted me to send and am so sick to think that all is lost. i am sitting here crying thinking about what this means to my pocketbook. i was just trying to get money together for my 5 and 9 year olds birthday by doing some trades and now all is lost. i never meant for this to happen and thought she was going to refuse the shipments as i would be out the shipping cost anyways but would still be able to make my money by selling locally. 12|5|i was just putting in about being pregnant|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|15:19:00|02/11/2009|
as i could not get said items back into my van and the house w/o hurting myself and i was hoping that she would just refuse items if shipping was to much to pay. i feel horrible but have just been paid $30 for items that totaled $80 because of a mistake on my part and was hoping that she would do the right thing and send them back. heck, i dont care if i have to send the full $100 back, i just wanted them back! 14|6|here is what i wouldve done|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|15:23:32|02/11/2009|
i wouldve gotten back ahold the person and let them know that i would send the items back to them as i wouldnt make enough money off them with the extra shipping cost included. she did tell me this. i had let her know that i had already sent and that i would return her money to her but wouldnt be able to do so until boyfriend got paid. i just sent her another email stating that i am truly sorry and that i screwed up and that the only way to make it right would be to refund her money but that i couldnt do that until the packages are returned. if this was me, i wouldnt feel right keeping it and not footing the extra money. my conscious would naw at me forever if i ever did this. i would in turn tell the ups guy that there was a misunderstanding and that they needed to go back. that is just me maybe not everyone would do the right thing. i have sent emails and asked for this and then told her i would give her all the money, i just hate having to think about what this means to my money or lack thereof, for the kids birthdays and it makes me so sick inside! 17|7|Why should she be out one penny? If she shipped back you would owe her her $100 + the $70 in shipping |teener|teenerzacsneenee@yahoo.com|15:38:03|02/11/2009|
>Posted on Feb-11-09 at 03:23 PM (Eastern)
>by 12.226.246.159i wouldve gotten back ahold
>the person and let them know
>that i would send the items
>back to them as i wouldnt
>make enough money off them with
>the extra shipping cost included. she
>did tell me this. i had
>let her know that i had
>already sent and that i would
>return her money to her but
>wouldnt be able to do so
>until boyfriend got paid. i just
>sent her another email stating that
>i am truly sorry and that
>i screwed up and that the
>only way to make it right
>would be to refund her money
>but that i couldnt do that
>until the packages are returned. if
>this was me, i wouldnt feel
>right keeping it and not footing
>the extra money. my conscious would
>naw at me forever if i
>ever did this. i would in
>turn tell the ups guy that
>there was a misunderstanding and that
>they needed to go back. that
>is just me maybe not everyone
>would do the right thing. i
>have sent emails and asked for
>this and then told her i
>would give her all the money,
>i just hate having to think
>about what this means to my
>money or lack thereof, for the
>kids birthdays and it makes me
>so sick inside!
21|8|nope, i talked to ups myself the morning after i shipped and they told me...|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|15:54:53|02/11/2009|
that if she refused the shipment she wouldnt be out one penny for it. the lady said as long as she doesnt open the packages they can be sent back to the original person for no out of pocket cost. i do this all the time when i get dvd's in the mail from columbia house and dont get charged unless i open them. i already let her know that. 23|9|But you neglect to mention you told her you would only refund her about half her money as you were out of it for shipping not the full amount|Kristy|mi3zons1@yahoo.com|16:01:31|02/11/2009|
Why would anyone in their right mind refuse the shipment knowing instead of getting $100 back they paid they'd only get $50 AND get NOTHING for it!
"Women should not have children after 35. Thirty-five children are enough." - anonymous (Only 28 to GO!) 25|10|i just sent her an email stating she could have all her money|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:03:27|02/11/2009|
back as soon as i saw that she refused to accept the packages. that is all i know to do to make this right and i feel horrible about it 13|1|WOW! That's alot for shipping, IMO (M)|bluh2oeyes|bluh2oeyes@yahoo.com|15:22:55|02/11/2009|
$80 UPS sounds high to me.
How much did each of the boxes actually weigh?
I normally ship Fedex Ground and have been quite pleased with thier prices for large items it runs $.50-$.75/lb.
I do ship large and heavy items quite often several have been HUGE and over 100 lbs. and I don't think I've ever been charged that much.
Just my 2 cents on UPS.
Jennifer in North Carolina...the Tar Heel State
15|2|total was 100lbs|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|15:24:30|02/11/2009|
for the two boxes total. 16|3|but what i told her about the shipping was...|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|15:31:35|02/11/2009|
anything over that i would let her know as i knew it would probably be more but didnt want to charge her too much. i told her i would get ahold of her after shipping it. since shipping was too much, i just let her know that she didnt have to accept the packages and then she could get her money back. i keep reiterating this as we had made a deal about the $18 for shipping but she knew this wasnt going to be enough and i told her that i would let her know what the rest of it was after shipping them 18|4|Can you post the original email? I don't know wnayone who would ok shipment not knowing the cost|teener|teenerzacsneenee@yahoo.com|15:40:07|02/11/2009|
>Posted on Feb-11-09 at 03:31 PM (Eastern)
>by 12.226.246.159anything over that i would
>let her know as i knew
>it would probably be more but
>didnt want to charge her too
>much. i told her i would
>get ahold of her after shipping
>it. since shipping was too much,
>i just let her know that
>she didnt have to accept the
>packages and then she could get
>her money back. i keep reiterating
>this as we had made a
>deal about the $18 for shipping
>but she knew this wasnt going
>to be enough and i told
>her that i would let her
>know what the rest of it
>was after shipping them
20|4|the problem is there is a big difference between the $18 and the $70. Now if the total shipping|jilda|vze4gj4m@verizon.net|15:44:11|02/11/2009|
came to $25 or even $30 than your deal sounds acceptable. If she already knew it wouldn't really cost $18 but somewhat more that's fine. but $70? is a huge difference and can definitely alter any deal she thought she was getting by buying these items from you instead of buying them herself in a store.
For example...I send someone a box of items regularly. The first time I did...I told her I wasn't sure how much it would be but we sort of agreed on a range of shipping. If it was more than that I would not have sent her the box and would have asked her what she wanted me to do. Maybe she would have send don't send so many I can't afford that right now, thus decreasing the shipping.
I'm sorry you had to bring all that stuff to the post office but that isn't the buyer's problem. You should have brought everything home and emailed her to say how much the shipping actually was and figure out what to do. Now you are probably out the shipping and the stress this is causing you.
19|1|You don't make a trade. agree to terms, get paid then go ship and then ask for more money|Kristy|mi3zons1@yahoo.com|15:41:43|02/11/2009|
"Women should not have children after 35. Thirty-five children are enough." - anonymous (Only 28 to GO!) 22|2|i didnt keep the original emails-she may have|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:00:51|02/11/2009|
i told her that i would let her know if shipping wasnt enough and get it later but also told her that if it wasnt too much over that i would pay for it and not worry about it. i emailed her as soon as i got home and let her know what the shipping cost was and told her that if she didnt want to pay the extra she could just refuse the boxes as that is what the gal at the post office let me know could happen after shipping them. 27|3|i could even refund the money asap|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:05:35|02/11/2009|
but wanted to know that packages had been refused before i sent. im not trying to make trouble and have had many successful trades here and dont want anyone to be mad at me. i could even send back half the money now on good faith and send the other half when i notice that the packages were on their way back but if she decided not to send them back to me, then she would have half her money back and all the $150 worth of product that was sent. 26|1|u have to eat the postage its not fair for the buyer to be out additional postage if u set a certain price for shipping then u are responsible for anything over that so live and learn from this mistake |gwens29|gwen41539@bellsouth.net|16:04:00|02/11/2009|
this is just my op though and it doesnt count lol
http://www.refundsweepers.com/dcforum/feedback/27.html
28|2|if she refused the packages or had ups come back|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:07:22|02/11/2009|
as long as the boxes arent opened, they will take them back and return to sender at no cost to her. hasnt anyone ever had to send something back that you got in the mail and just crossed off your address and put return to sender on it? they will take it back if not opened and i have had to do this with several items, including columbia house and items for daycare kids. 29|3|anyone could call them and ask about their return policy|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:14:04|02/11/2009|
they would say the same thing that they told me. all she has to do is refuse the shipment and it comes back to me and then i am out the money for shipping totally. its 1-800-742-5877. i called them on tuesday morning and they said all she had to do was refuse it or stick a note wherever it would be delivered at and tell them she didnt want them left. 30|4|i found it in my sent box-what i sent her|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:16:55|02/11/2009|
i
> > think another $8 for
> > shipping would probably be fine. if the $15 doesnt
> cover it
> > and its way over i
> > will let you know. if its short not by much, i will
> not
> > worry about it at all.
33|5|JMO but|Mumzie|luckiestbamboo2@aol.com|16:22:17|02/11/2009|
A deal is a deal. If you told her X amount for shipping and it cost sooo much more then you shouldnt have sent
till you talked to her. I would chalk it up to a mistake.Live and learn.
You already paid $70 for shipping then you wanted her to return the items but you would still be out $70 for shipping.
JMO 36|6|i would be able to recoup all money-selling locally|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:30:50|02/11/2009|
i would still be making money on the items as i could still sell them and get the money out of them. i know that probably make much sense but i even asked her to just pay for shipping on the rest of one of the boxes and that i would pay for the other. the total for each box came to $35 apiece. i told her i would pay for one box and she could pay for the other and that $17 would even it out but like i said. i have sent her several emails and she wont get back to me. she could even verify that what i put in about the postage was exactly what i sent to her. i was willing to compromise with her to still not be out the total $50. i clearly stated that if it was a lot more, i would let her know and if not then i would eat it. she knew it would be more to ship and i told her that. i am still totally willing to cover half of the shipping and have her only pay $17. i totally thought that was fair 35|5|You said right here that if it was way over you would let her know.....you didnt say you would send them anyway, and that is where the problem lies....if you sent them anyway, then you are out the additional cost for the shipping....|saint6811|waylan@comcast.net|16:28:27|02/11/2009|
"Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy." 31|1|If the boxes|Gail_O|gailandlarryondrej@gmail.com|16:21:16|02/11/2009|
were too heavy for you to lift, that should have been a major clue that it would cost more than $18 to ship. Bottom line is you should never automatically expect someone to foot the bill for something, you always need to ask. Between you and your BF you could have estimated the weight, used tools on the UPS site to estimate shipping costs and get an answer from the person you were trading with before you shipped the items. Since you didn't let her make the decision, its only right that you eat the costs. 32|1|I am totally missing something here. Why would you want them back and be out $70?? Right now, you have at least $30 more than you started with....|greenfrog57|greenfrog57@yahoo.com|16:21:42|02/11/2009|
Laura in NM
34|2|$30? wow|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:26:47|02/11/2009|
the total for the items that she was getting was $80, not $30. dont you see where i am coming from. the other money was supposed to be for my kids birthday and i had to spend that on shipping. i posted the email that was sent and let her know that i would get ahold of her if shipping was any more than what i told her. i even told her that i would eat up the cost for 1 box for shipping and that all she would have to pay was $17 more as i didnt realize that it would be that much more. i thought that was fair and then neither of us would be out much more. 37|3|so, your email said another $8, not another $50 you've got some crazy math there|greenfrog57|greenfrog57@yahoo.com|16:31:34|02/11/2009|
Laura in NM
40|4|as items were being added into the box|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:40:37|02/11/2009|
at that point it was 40 boxes of 12 count poptarts that were being added in. but i clearly stated that not much over shipping and i would pay and if over, i would email her back. i have always done this in the past and been pretty lucky i guess. just didnt think it would be that big of a deal but i guess it was. i got totally screwed and even agreed to ante some of the money for shipping if she would just pay for 1 box to be shipped. is that asking too much? i made an honest mistake and they could be sent back and she would get all her money back. i didnt think that was asking too much. as she would have her money back and i could still potentially make the money back for the kids birthdays! sorry!!!! 41|4|you should have e-mailed her before shipping...you assumed she would help cover the difference, buyer should have been given a choice wheather|HONEY11|HONEY1@AMERITECH.NET|16:42:12|02/11/2009|
she'd still want the boxes or not...but you sent them anyway..how do you know she'd have the money to cover that high shipping? It was just all assumed by you. I think you'll have to cut your loss and chalk it up as a learning lesson. I sold items when I was new to e-bay, miscalculated shipping and ended up out of my own pocket a extra $5, I did'nt contact the buyer for the extra shipping as it was my mistake...after all was said and done, I ended up not making a penny off my item, I chalked it up as a learing experience, my fault and let it go and moved on..If you knew you could have sold the items locally, you should have just done that from the get go to spare yourself and others all this hassle..
One person caring about another represents life's greatest value.
o
o
@..@
(----)
( )--( )
o0..0o
Linda
38|3|here is what she got from me....|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:37:05|02/11/2009|
50 boxes of poptarts-retail-$80
1 supper back-retail-$3 something
1 box of popcorn-retail $2 something
10 bottles of vaseline lotion-retail $30
johnons buddies-retail $6
9 packages of baby wipes-retail $9
6 purse sized tums-retail $12
20 boxes of crystal light-retail at least $20
3 boxes of special k red berries-retail $7.50
total for all items is 169.50. i was trying to give her a good deal of $80 for the items and that was a good deal. didnt figure the shipping would be a big deal until after i had shipped them and emailed her afterwards.
39|4|if all of those things retailed to almost $170 like you said.she would be paying $150..right?|jilda|vze4gj4m@verizon.net|16:40:02|02/11/2009|
$80 for the items and $70 for shipping..that doesn't sound like a great deal and I honestly don't know anyone who would agree to that. 42|5|that is why i asked her to just pay the addition $17...|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:42:20|02/11/2009|
and we could call it even. that is the postage for one of the boxes and i would pay for the other box. i was willing to do that to make her and i both happy in this deal. 43|6|you would rather be out 70 than $17?|Mumzie|luckiestbamboo2@aol.com|16:46:15|02/11/2009|
right now you are only out $17 but you are asking to be out $70 because you want her to send them back then that
would mean you paid $70 for no reason..
44|7|right now, i am out $50|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|16:51:20|02/11/2009|
having her pay half for shipping would make me feel better about the whole thing. then i would only be out $35 instead of $50. i know i would still be out money but not as much as i am now. 45|8|in all honesty, I don't think it is fair of you to ask her to cover anymore shipping, you just shipped it all, without asking her what she thinks about it,|HONEY11|HONEY1@AMERITECH.NET|17:08:42|02/11/2009|
and giving her a choice in the matter you decided for her. ask yourself if you'd be okay with that if someone did that to you...ship your items and then they ask you for more shipping after they shipped and they expect you to pay up more out of your pocket, without telling you in advance and letting you decide if you still want the stuff or not, or if higher shipping is okay with you. I don't think you'd like that too much..communication with buyer was totally lost here, you should have kept her informed of all info..
46|8|JMO-I ship tons of boxes of stockpiles|BusterBrown|srfreezerqueen@hotmail.com|17:17:50|02/11/2009|
Posted on Feb-11-09 at 05:17 PM (Eastern) by 64.136.27.227
and can not tell you how many trips i have made to the post office to get quotes......and carried em in, out and back in AFTER i get the buyers ok on a box......I would never consider shipping without an ok, unless I have an agreement with a person like Jilda mentioned.....NOT once would i consider shipping it without an ok....
there are a few people on here that i ship so much to that they know i ship the cheapest possible way so they know i am not going to send a box that should go parcel priority etc....
judging by your list of stuff you sent...and the post in which you had stuff listed for....you did not expect as much for them as you are claiming they are worth....kinda of confused by the retail post as you wanted less in yours....so it seems you are trying to say they are worth much more that you wanted for them...I look at it as while the retail may be more, if you list you want it for x amount, then you are only out x amount...not the retail amount....Not sure who in all was getting these, but if it was for personal use, then your price of what you wanted it for was not bad...but judging by the quantities that you listed it is for one of the gals who resells stuff.....then she definitely needed to know postage to know if it was a cost effective purchase-I know i have traded with both types....and know i can charge more for those that use stuff personally vs the ones that resell. I do not do that but understand that it is something that can be done...based upon conversations i have had with some traders...
I hate to say it, but feel that whomever the buyer was, it is not her responsibility.....IF you had refunded her paypal prior to the packages arriving, then the person could have sent them back....but without that happening, I know i would not have-.....for future reference-know the dimensions of the box, get the wt from either the po or the shipping place, and simply call the other for a quote if that is easier-do not tote it around...I do this quite a bit as well....Jodie
op was edited as i had the wrong name in there....content is still the same...Jodie
47|8|my 2 cents|crenchen|crenchen@aol.com|17:39:35|02/11/2009|
I sell stuff on this board all the time and I have never had anyone offer me half of what my items cost so you did good when she paid you $80 for $170 in suff and then another $20 for the shipping, that is basically $100 for $170 in stuff. I am lucky to get $50 for $150 in brand new items plus the shipping. What you should have done was take the items boxed them up and had them weighed and shipping costs determined, emailed her back with the shipping costs and then worked something out from there. There is no way someone is paying $80 plus $70 for shipping for $170 in stuff and honestly I don't think anyone would pay $80 plus the $35 you are asking her to cover now because that is not a huge savings for her. I realize you are out all those items but you still made $30 from them of course that is if you got them items for free or pennies on the dollar. But unless she agreed to pay the extra shipping or to refuse them if you shipped them to her then you are just out. Because if I would have made the trade with you I would have expected you to email me with the shipping costs before mailing because you and her both should have known that if the boxes were that heavy and depending on how far apart you live that it was going to be costly. I ship all the time from OH to KY around 22-25 pounds for $15-$16 and if you have been trading that long then you knew they were going to be costly. I would just chalk it up to a lesson learned and not to ever do it again. I know that doesn't help with the money you need for the kid's but maybe you have some other items you can sell and make some more money. 48|9|this is pretty much what i had to offer|bubbag1|bandy3303@yahoo.com|18:22:09|02/11/2009|
i paid $50 alone for the poptarts that she got and now like i said wont get half that out of them. i tried emailing her about this and telling her i would give her money back but she has never emailed me back at all. i have tried several times to correspond with her and she wont get back to me at all. that is the problem that i am having with all of this. i tried to make amends but could never get back ahold of her after letting her know that i had shipped items after all. 49|10|Ok, the problem is that you shipped them anyway without consulting with the buyer first....when the shipping was THAT far off of your estimate, there is NO way you should have expected her to pay half....sorry, but you can explain it 10 ways til Sunday and it all adds up to the same thing...you sent without getting the ok from the buyer.|saint6811|waylan@comcast.net|18:33:41|02/11/2009|
"Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy." 50|11|chalk it up to your loss and move on|crenchen|crenchen@aol.com|18:38:26|02/11/2009|
live and learn 51|1|I wouldn't blame her for not refusing the items|Beaglesfly|lmllr77@aol.com|19:14:41|02/11/2009|
It sounds like at first you weren't even offering to return her entire amount, only half, so why would she refuse the items knowing she's going to be out half her money PLUS the items.
And if you wanted her to ship back, you should have refunded the entire amount right then and there when she said she was unhappy to prove you would refund her money and wouldn't leave her twisting in the wind. I understand that you said you didn't have the full amount to refund then, but then again, you shouldn't expect her to just refuse the items HOPING she gets all her money back.
This doesn't make much sense. You're saying you'll pay the return shipping, but why would you want to be out the $70 for the original shipping plus another $70 for the return shipping for only a $150 worth of stuff?
It's been said 1000 times before, but I don't think it's what you were hoping or expecting to hear: You made the mistake, live and learn from it.
lauren
52|2|I wouldnt refuse either.How would I know if I would get all my money refunded.|RobinsCrazyWorld|robinmarie72@gmail.com|19:46:52|02/11/2009|
(\__/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")
I would rather have a mind opened by wonder than one closed by belief.
53|1|I am the buyer in question.....|ptmama525|ptmama525@aol.com|20:42:59|02/11/2009|
The options I was given yesterday IMO were not fair to me (they ALL involved me being out money for her mistake)
I have been gone most of the day, however when I got home this evening I had 3 emails from the OP and was aware of this post, so figured I would reply here. I'm sorry the OP feels she has been wronged by me, I never agreed to pay anymore shipping during the trade, her prices were quoted "shipped" and as mean as this may sound this trade is finshed.
Deedra
54|2|THOUGHT IT MIGHT BE YOU DEEDRA, AND YOU ARE 100 % RIGHT....SAD SITUATION, BUT NOT YOUR FAULT|JOYHAPPYONE|DAIDOLA5@AOL.COM|21:13:02|02/11/2009|
I'M TOO GOOD LOOKING TO BE THIS OLD...AT MY AGE I'VE SEEN IT ALL, I'VE HEARD IT ALL, AND I'VE DONE IT ALL..I JUST CAN'T REMEMBER IT ALL!!!!!!!! 55|3|what you need to do from now on |xxsasseyxx|shopgirlmgr@yahoo.com|07:51:52|02/12/2009|
anything you ship that you know is heavy you need to get it weighed and get prices on it and send it to the person and let them make there mind up if they want to pay that amount or not . or maybe even break it down into flat rate boxes see if it wont ship cheaper that way .. i know me and i would keep the stuff and you be out you shipped on your own and i know deedra delt with her plenty of times and she has never done anyone wrong .. i been on this board forever..lol over 8 years now sometimes you just get in a hurry and dont think and it cost you .. this is one of those times .. so suck it up and go on.... 56|1|if i am reading everything correctly.................|pussecat|pu55ecat@aol.com|08:54:05|02/12/2009|
***edited because i can't spell this morning! lol
and the trader RECIEVING the goods sends them back then all the orginal owner should have to recoupe the receiver is $80.00 of the $100 sent because the orginal trade was for $100.00 minus the shipping of $20.00 and the trader did ship the items. now, if the receiver KEEPS the items then the sender is OUT the $70.00 shipping because it was orginally stated that shipping should be $20.00 but it was actually more.
personally, if i were them i'd let the trade go............... deedra keep the stuff and bubbag1 just take the loss.
***** BOYCOTT COUPON CLIPPING SERVICES that don't want YOU trading *****
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57|2|Sorry, Bubbag, but I agree with everyone else. And I sympathize...I did that too once (though on a smaller scale). I posted some items with a shipped price...then realized they wouldn't fit in the original box I had and had to get a box...then when I shipped I ended up LOSING (no profit) about $3. So, not only did I make nothing on the box (no profit) I took a $3 loss. The trade cost me $3 and the cost of a box and the time to post and the time to go to the PO. After that, I took items in to the PO, confirm postage and then send after the buyer agrees. AND if I post anything shipped...it is in a flat rate box so I KNOW what my shipping will be. I am sorry things went badly for you in this trade. But, I can't imagine ANYONE sending a box at over 4 Xs the amount agreed on and expecting the other person to pay it.|Barb09|Barb0969@AOL.com|11:46:27|02/12/2009|
I looked and looked and found no coupons for troll food......SO, I don't feed the trolls!! 58|1|as the sender..I would take the loss too BUT|blessedx5|I_am_blessedx5@yahoo.com|13:01:14|02/12/2009|
as the receiver I would feel really bad for the sender having to put out so much. If the sender could prove they paid that much my concious would eat at me...I would offer them something more than just $20 out of $70. I mean maybe some good coupons or rebates or whatever... I know I would not be obligated to do so but I just personally would. 59|2|But she didn't have to send it The trade was made the amounts agreed to People need to be held for their mistakes Or she could have|teener|teenerzacsneenee@yahoo.com|13:07:17|02/12/2009|
thought it out better and contacted the buyer before it was sent 60|1|ITA...Im just saying for ME...I would totally feel bad....|blessedx5|I_am_blessedx5@yahoo.com|13:18:46|02/12/2009|
and thats just me...times are too iffy concerning familys finances right now...if this were a business thats one thing they could actually write the loss off and loose nothing, but IMO this is money from an individual and their family and I just wouldnt feel right about it. Mistakes happen, we ALL have to admit that...and sometimes it costs us....I just personally would not let it cost someones family if I had anything to do with it...If actual cash is a problem...dont send her the $50 or any part of it. But most couponers/refunders have extra coupons, refunds, or other stuff we can share to generate saving money...look at all the stuff that comes out of the woodwork for angel auctions...like I said ....JMHO...and I would atleast have compassion about it (like some other posters in this post do)
Also if it were me (and I will likely do this myself) I would stipulate for any trades NOT to mail without a solid shipping price.... 61|1|wow...looking at the list of stuff she sent.....|blessedx5|I_am_blessedx5@yahoo.com|13:34:40|02/12/2009|
The sender could have never made me beleive it would only cost $20 to ship (the 10 bottles of lotion alone would cost more than that parcel post)...I have received enough stockpile boxes and have sent more boxes to dh while deployed to have figured that out.... 62|2|wow, *common sense* should have come into play here|QponFreebieQueen|QponFreebieQueen@gmail.com|14:24:51|02/12/2009|
That high of shipping should be an instant red flag to contact the buyer if they wanted
to pay that much extra and if not come to an understanding and undo the deal. But if you
had in writing (email) what the total was with shipping, then it would stand as that being a contract. You cannot alter a contract without both parties agreeing to it. You would have to pay out those extra shipping costs yourself, and be more prepared next time with acurate shipping costs on your next trade.
Sorry this happened to all parties involved.
Please Email All Responses To:
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