Thanks for the responses yesterday, I appreciate the support, even if not everyone had tips!!
I went ahead and made a chore chart, just as I'd spelled out in my post, and I *DID* include dh, making him completely responsible for the meals (I'm speaking just dinners, here) for ea. and every Tues. and every other wkend. when his children are here.
I showed him @ dinner last night and he didn't argue at all...though I could tell he didn't totally relish HIS chore....lol! I tactly explained that the reason I'd assigned him dinner duty for those times is because I truly believe he (nor his children) does not appreciate all I do. I stated that when they all roll in the door @ about 3:45pm, on Tuesdays, I've already got dinner bubbling away and those kids come in hungry!! The 10 yr. old's (his son) FIRST QUESTION when he hits the door is "what's for dinner", and then "when will it be ready"? SOOOOOO I am really anxious to see this play out.
They are all going to have to WAIT for Dad to get changed from wk. clothes, visit the restroom for 20 min's. (lol--men!), then saunter into the kitchen and get things around. We probably won't eat before 5/5:30 pm, and I'm sure it will be "bachelor" fare to boot~~but you know what?>> I told dh that is fine, we will eat what he fixes, and that if he chooses to just go out to eat (what he typically does if I'm sick, don't make something, whatever), that he has to take us ALL out to eat....meaning my son as well because when his kids are here, I cook for EVERYBODY. lol.....I'm such a 'lil demon sometimes.....guess it's my red hair!!
Also, I asked him what consequences there would be if someone (read: his daughter) didn't do their chores. I asked at least 2 times, and he completely refused to answer! So, this morning I woke w/a new attitude: If his daughter doesn't do the vacuuming, Ron will step in and do it for her, it's his MO. And you know what??? I've decided that if he wants to do her chores for her, far be it from ME to take issue. At least it's getting done...and NOT by ME. So, I will not say a WORD if this plays out that way.
I'm so proud of myself....I think this is a step in the right direction around here. We have more "adjustments" to make as a blended family, but I'm really trying to figure this all out.
Shelly 1|1|^^ bump..thanks for responses!|shelly|shellysue49@gmail.com|06:25:03|12/19/2008|
This was getting lost at the bottom of the pg., wanted to thank all those who responded to my post asking about chores. Now you can read what I've done. Sure hope it works,
Shelly