Posted on Dec-13-08 at 06:53 PM (Eastern) by 67.236.178.178
.......feeling left out today. Hubby and his kids went shopping all afternoon today, they've completed their Holiday shopping but were getting my stepdaughter's Semi-Formal dress. I wasn't included. They had dinner out and are at a movie now. Won't get home till I'm in bed.
My feelings were *very* hurt, but I ended up making some pnut butter crinkle cookies (the ones w/Hershey Kiss in the middle) late this afternoon. Actually just finished up with those, threw a load of laundry in and am waiting on my teen son to get back home. I sent him out for Subway sandwiches for the two of us.
Unfortunately, this happens a lot around here....the 3 of them go off and do their own thing, leaving me & my son to do whatever. Sometimes when this happens I'll spend the whole day w/my son and we will go out to eat, etc., but I don't have a job, so I need to cut back on these outings.
DH hasn't bothered to call & check in, say hi, anything all day.
What do you want to bet, though, that the minute all 3 hit the door and see those cookies, they will be all over them, without even a thank you!??!
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Shelly
1|1|Why don't you invite the 2 of you along? You are a family...you don't NEED to get invited....just tell them you would love to go and be a family. Maybe you can make the step towards sealing you into being the 5 of you instead of the 3 of them and the 2 of you. Sorry you are hurt and left out today....I know that hurts.|Barb09|Barb0969@AOL.com|19:45:44|12/13/2008|
I looked and looked and found no coupons for troll food......SO, I don't feed the trolls!! 2|2|shelly..I think you need to speak up!|shellysmsmo|jpksms@sbcglobal.net|22:57:36|12/13/2008|
not in a mean, fighting way.. BUT I think you need to voice your opinion. When you 2 get in bed tonight..I think you should talk to him.
Just be open and honest and just start off by saying... "I really want you to know, that I felt left out, and I was hurt, but being left out tonight"...
tell him, it's not the first time..and you feel that if this keeps happening...you will always feel like there are 2 families..instead of 1. You should
all go out together. You see how you are feeling...can you imagine what your son is feeling? He may not say anything..but he is going to feel resentment.
I hope it all works out.. but opening up and saying what you feel now...may help in the long run!!! NOW share those cookies!!!
3|1|Hey GF~*~|RebekkaVA|queen_vulture@msn.com|23:22:32|12/13/2008|
I'm so sorry this happened and that you were hurt. I do think you and Ron need to have a heart to heart and let him know how you feel, it could be he just has always been use to going out with his kids and didn't give it a second thought about having you come along, I'm not trying to make excuses for him but sometimes old habits are hard to break. You need to let him know that he's married now and that you all should be included as one family and not be divided as two families. Hugs, Rebekka
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4|2|Thanks, ladies....|shelly|shellysue49@gmail.com|08:27:19|12/14/2008|
...actually I HAVE said something the last couple times that he's done this. I told him exactly how I feel....about us being two families not one, and he just brushes me off. Yesterday, he told me to "quit being difficult"?! So it's definitely not a matter of him not being aware, or just being spontaneous, whatever. I asked why just the 3 of them were going yesterday and he said that "when his kids are here he's going to spend time with THEM", again, missing the point about how we can (and should, imo) spend time together since we are a "new" family and trying to blend together.
I give the three of them plenty of space, before anyone says that maybe they just need some. When his kids are here, I will often make myself scarce while they all watch a movie, or they will all go to a school game and I'll stay home. I do this because I want to be considerate of his children and don't want them to think I'm encroaching on THEIR time with their father, or trying to come between the relationship they have with him. But, I think it's going too far in the other direction now and all my talking has fallen on deaf ears.
Shelly