"Ok, how can I get my boy to NOT poop in pants?"

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"Ok, how can I get my boy to NOT poop in pants?"
 Posted by mrsrobinson on Jul-06-05 at 03:01 PM (Eastern)
Posted on Jul-06-05 at 03:01 PM (Eastern) by 24.209.34.115

My oldest toddler, Damien (4 years old) has got the potty training thing down pat--at least in theory. He is awesome at peeing in the potty, but for some reason he just doesn't want to poop in the potty. He knows when he is pooping, because he leaves the room. Then, he tells me and we go and clean him off. Or, sometimes he will start to poop in his underwear (not to be graphic, but there is usually enough to need to be scraped off) and then he will sit on the potty and try to poop out the rest.

It is so frustrating! I know he understands the whole concept, he is just too stubborn! We need to take care of this problem very soon so that he can go to preschool in the fall. I've tried stickers with a chart, candy rewards, other rewards, and nothing has helped. We keep telling him that as soon as he thinks he *might* need to poop, he needs to go to the potty. Help!!!

:) Michelle

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1 . "ummmm..since rewards dont work...(M)"
 Posted by countrygirl0521 on Jul-06-05 at 03:48 PM (Eastern)
Posted on Jul-06-05 at 03:48 PM (Eastern) by 205.188.116.5

maybe you should put him in a pull up, and let him sit in it for a little bit.. because then maybe he wont like the feel of it and realize he needs to go in the potty?? just a suggestion. I know most kids are afraid of sitting on the potty. And obviously he comes to you to change him out of it after he does it, so right there shows he doesnt like the feeling, so maybe tring that might help.. i know it sounds gross so just dont leave him in it for a long period of time. Maybe for like 5 minutes. if that.. Im just tring to think.. I know stickers worked for my son, but i have a stuborn 20 month old that im going to try soon.. and i think i might have problems with him. :) remember, this is just a suggestion.. lol.. i dont want bashed for suggesting keeping him in a poopy pull up.. lol.. thats a tough one though.. Good luck!!

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2 . "Inside...."
 Posted by kntrichik on Jul-06-05 at 04:42 PM (Eastern)
Posted on Jul-06-05 at 04:42 PM (Eastern) by 152.163.100.5

I let my son sit on the potty backwards. He's only 3 but he used to run to get a pull up and finally I plopped him on like that and it worked. He faces the back of the toilet. Strange I know, but he poops on the potty. Maybe having to sit that way "helps" him. It can be a little scary for kids to sit on the potty. They are so used to squatting from when they were in diapers.

I also agree with the previous poster, don't clean him up immediately and have him help you clean himself. If he wants to go to school, I would make sure that he understands they do not allow that at school and maybe it will help.

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3 . "Thanks...he does understand about school ---->"
 Posted by mrsrobinson on Jul-06-05 at 05:07 PM (Eastern)
Posted on Jul-06-05 at 05:07 PM (Eastern) by 24.209.34.115

And he really really wants to go to school--that's why I can't understand why he isn't really trying to poop in the potty.

I'll try the backwards sitting thing--we haven't tried that. As for leaving him in his poopy underwear, I do that already, though not for long--I have him go sit in the bathroom for a little while, 5 minutes or so. This lets him know that I will help him, but that I'm not going to just drop everything and jump up to clean him off, kwim? I clean him off, but I make him do everything else--taking off the underwear, getting new underwear, etc.

I just don't get it...he isn't scared of the potty--he has no problem going pee. And he comes in the bathroom with DH and with me all the time. And he has watched the Potty Power DVD lots of times. So he definitely knows what to do--he is just being totally stubborn!

I don't want to be negative toward him about it--I've read that scolding or anything like that just makes kids regress and doesn't do any good. I'm just not sure what else to try...

:) Michelle

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4 . "Good luck....wish I could get my son that far...."
 Posted by Beaglesfly on Jul-06-05 at 10:14 PM (Eastern)
Posted on Jul-06-05 at 10:14 PM (Eastern) by 205.188.116.8

>My son refuses to tell me when he has to do ANYTHING! I tried lots of things. I've put him on the toilet and he understands how to pee on it, but when he's off the pot he won't tell me when he has to go.

I told him we were going to give up the diapers on a certain day. I sat him on the toilet for quite a while and he didn't do anything so I put him in big boy underwear and he peed about two minutes after I put them on him....no warning, didn't even seem to mind the wet feeling. I changed him...about half an hour later the same thing. Changed him again and this time he did a pooper. Never said a word before or after....he did not seem to care one bit. Yeesh. I can't force him to tell me WHEN he has to go, so I don't know what the heck to do.

Rewards don't seem to work, praise doesn't seem to help much either.

Lauren

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5 . "don't put pants on him.... he he he"
 Posted by banditeyes33 on Jul-06-05 at 10:21 PM (Eastern)
Posted on Jul-06-05 at 10:21 PM (Eastern) by 205.188.116.5

i'm sorry i have problems
:)

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6 . "That is how I potty trained my son"
 Posted by ddbnana on Jul-06-05 at 10:36 PM (Eastern)
Posted on Jul-06-05 at 10:36 PM (Eastern) by 64.136.27.226

He would go the potty when he darn well felt like it. But when he was busy doing something he would just go in his pull-ups. So I hid the rest of the pull-ups that I had left. Well the smart little booger found them, hid them under his bed & would put them on when he needed them. So I let him think that I had no idea that he had a private stash & when they were all gone I put him into the big boy underwear. Well he would pee in the potty but not poop. So to my husbands dismay, I took his underwear & hid them (of course I let him wear them when we went to the store or when we were outside or had company visiting!). Well he stared using the potty pretty soon after that cause he wanted his big boy underwear back. Of course he still had ocassional accidents, but that is to be expected.

Thank you,
Mary in Florida
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7 . "there's hope at the end of the tunnel"
 Posted by sd_cinderella on Jul-07-05 at 00:58 AM (Eastern)
Posted on Jul-07-05 at 00:58 AM (Eastern) by 68.7.144.6

Just went through this with my grandson. He will be four years old in about three months and he just consented to poop in the potty about two months ago.

My daughter took this approach:

When he had to poop, he would tell his mom that he wanted a "dawper" and she would put it on him. He would run under the table and squat until he had finished. When my daughter would ask him if he was done, he would say "no" and so we figured he didn't want to part with it just yet.

She would ask him again several times and finally if she needed to move on to something else, she would grab him and clean him up. He was usually cooperative about being cleaned up but he refused to do his poops in the potty, saying it was "too hard" that way.

We always cleaned him up as soon as he was ready to be cleaned and we stopped talking about the issue except to once in a while ask him if he wanted to try sitting on the potty.

One day my daugher got him to sit on the potty by promising to give him a quarter. He was really into collecting quarters at the time and so he agreed. My daughter instructed him to sit on the potty adaptor and put his feet up on the big seat so he could push the poop out easier. It worked. He's cooperating daily now and wouldn't think of going back to the "dawpers".

I think the lesson is that it is the one thing that a child can control when he can't control most other things in his life. I totally approved of my daughter's sensitive handling of his potty problems and in the end, the problem had a satisfactory resolution.

Good luck.

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8 . "Had the same problem with a boy I used to babysit! He was a hard bugger to train!"
 Posted by kandywolf on Jul-07-05 at 04:55 AM (Eastern)
Posted on Jul-07-05 at 04:55 AM (Eastern) by 24.115.107.7

He would pee in it fine but not poop! Maybe it is the size of the toilet? I got him a potty chair, and I sat it in the living room put the coffee table in front of it, and he had to sit there til he went. After a few days, he got sick of sitting on the potty for hours and it worked! So maybe if you are trying thw toilet it might just seem too much (Even with an adaptor) Alot of times they dont like to be "Watched" while they do it, so that is how I thought of the coffee table pooty chair deal! the coffee table was too heavy for him to move (It was solid oak) so I knew he was there and stuck there, so I could go in the next room and know he couldnt get out! HTH! Kandy


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9 . "Reinforce where poopie goes"
 Posted by Sara_s_Mom on Jul-07-05 at 10:47 AM (Eastern)
Posted on Jul-07-05 at 10:47 AM (Eastern) by 162.83.122.103

if you goes in his pants, make sure he is with you when you put it in the potty and flush, so that he knows that is exactly where poopie goes. You could also try having him go to the bathroom at specified times. Is he an early morning pooper? If he poops about the same time each day, you could try putting him on just to try. When you see him slinking off to poop, you could ask him if he has to go. Kids are notorious for hiding when they poop their pants.

Hope this helps!

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10 . "Thanks for all the help --->"
 Posted by mrsrobinson on Jul-07-05 at 01:16 PM (Eastern)
Posted on Jul-07-05 at 01:16 PM (Eastern) by 24.209.34.115

I think I'll just ease off for awhile and try to treat it like it is no big deal. I sure hope my younger boy is easier to train, though, LOL!

:) Michelle

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